Life's up's and down's...who do I trust?

HEY WORLD!!!
Sometimes God really gets to ya. I felt that today. Sojourn (the singing group that I'm in here at school) went to an old folks home. It was stretching. We sang, and that went well, but after, when we were hanging out in the lounge of the home, we got to know some of the people there. Some were very kind, and others were simply unable to communicate with you. Either they could not hear, could not speak, or were simply too disillusioned to understand what you were doing talking to them. I really shocked me. I know that may sound sheltered, but God really hit me with some truths about the world. I've been finding that God is showing me more and more what it means to trust him and He is showing me soooooooooo much about His love. He's pulling me away from the things that I find joy in and teaching me to seek joy and love in Him.
Why am I always trying to find my own way through life?
You'd think I'd learn after a couple of circumstances. You'd think I'd catch on at some point. That something would click inside my head and I'd completely understand - "DUH, Josh! You're supposed to trust GOD!!!" - but I find that I still fall. I still end up seeking my own way. I'm sinful. But that's no excuse. Why is it that though I may be seen as a Christian, I don't feel like it sometimes? Why is it that I'm so weak sometimes to reach up to heaven and too stubborn to ask God for help. All He's really asking me to do is to leave it up to Him and sit back and trust Him. That's it. WHY CAN'T I GET IT?
God is changing my heart. As I grow in my walk with Him, I'm beginning to realize that things are best left up to God, and just follow Him. It's like Martin Luther said - "Everything I have kept in my own hands, I have lost; but everything I have put into God's hands, I have kept forever." God created the earth, and it's still filled with life and beautiful things since he created it, so why can't I trust that a God that made all this will take care of me? I need to. You need to.
What are we waiting for?
Trust. I gotta learn to trust. I'm weak, but with God I can do anything (Phil. 4:13). Crazy. The God who is the Ancient of Days, King of Kings and Lord of Lords can work through somebody like me.
So yeah, why do I worry? Why do I put my trust in myself and not in God?
You got me.
Looks like I have something to learn and work on about trust.
Just wondering, who do you trust? Why do you trust them? I would like to say that there is never a more important decision you can make than to put your trust and faith in Christ.
Hang in there, sportsfans.

josh d.